Althorp
Saturday 14 June. Hardly time to draw breath, and say hello to the girls, before Lou and I leave for the Althorp Literary Festival, a small but select affair with just twenty authors speaking over two days. The other authors include novelists Helen Dunmore, Allan Mallinson, Justine Picardie and Tracy Chevalier; autobiographers General Sir Mike Jackson and Jonathan Powell (Tony Blair’s Chief of Staff); historian Alison Weir; poets Ben Okri and Andrew Motion; child writer Anthony Horowitz; broadcaster John Humphreys; and comedian Julian Clary. I’ve had to turn down two previous invitations, thanks to clashes with my ‘outlaw’ weekend, so a great relief that I could make this one. We arrive at 3pm to be met by Charles Spencer who goes straight up to my wife, whom he’s never met, and says ‘You must be Lou’. She’s utterly charmed.
We’re shown to a gorgeous room with a four poster bed - aptly named the Indian Silk Room - in the main house, and quickly get down to business by attending Patrick Bishop’s talk on his first historical novel, ‘A Good War’ (we have the same fiction editor, the excellent Nick Sayers, so I’m keen to see how well it does). I ask a few questions, as does Gen Jackson, but the best is from Lou: ‘Can you read out page 96?’ (Patrick had earlier said his sex scene was on that page). On from there to Julian Clary’s event. V entertaining, particularly when a member of the audience asked him how he’d dared come back to the Northampton area after his previous derogatory comments on TV about the town. He denied making them, but the interrogator was not convinced.
In the evening we dine al fresco at the pavilion, with a fabulous view of deer grazing in the park. I sit next to Charles Spencer and Julian Clary who is surprisingly self-effacing and touchingly shy. He’s brought his dog and a partner he describes, pointedly, as his ‘current boyfriend’. After we retire to the library for drinks and coffee in front of a blazing fire, and I end the evening playing snooker with Richard Foreman, literary publicist supremo, against Ben Okri, Andrew Motion and Jonathan Powell. We win, and Richard insists our opponents pay their £5 bet. Next morning he tells Ben Okri he’s used the money to buy five lottery tickets. Ben replies, jokingly, that he should ‘grow up’!
Sunday 15th June. Lovely breakfast with the other authors. I say to Julian Clary: ‘I hope you don’t think this is a vulgar question, but how much did you get paid for your novel?’ He replies: ‘It is a vulgar question but I’ll answer it anyway. Sixty thousand.’ He adds that he got £90,000 for his autobiography (which sold very well). I’m amazed, and tell him he should change his agent!
After breakfast Lou and I go for a quick walk round the Diana lake with Ben and Suzi Feay. The author photo in front of the house is next, and then I drive over to the Northampton Waterstone’s (about 9 miles away) with Richard to sign some stock. I get back in time to meet Helen Dunmore in the green room and we chat about a mutual friend, the novelist Rachel Cusk. Then it’s time for my 12.30 event in the state banquet room. My talk on the 1st Afghan War in the 19th Century goes well, though the audience could have been bigger, and after lunch I catch half of Alison Weir’s excellent joint event with Tracy Borman before we have to head for home. A cracking weekend, and by far the best literary festival experience I’ve had. I hope I’m back next year, to talk about my first novel, but I’ve been warned that an invite two years running is unlikely. We’ll see.